We understand you may feel compelled to support us, but please, think twice. When you purchase our merchandise, you are not investing in the future of music; you are simply ensuring we can afford new guitar strings. Buy responsibly, or better yet, just give us 5¢ and save yourself the clutter. Some of the merch we considered:

• Wooden nickels
• 5¢ Miracle ear plugs
• A t-shirt that says “Sorry”
• A mug that changes color when you are sad or lose hope
• Chopsticks

Aren’t you glad we have none of that for sale right now?